Tuesday, February 22, 2011

How To Tuesday: 12 Step Rejection Recovery Program

Several years ago I made a list of how to deal with rejection when entering quilt shows. And to this day I still get the dreaded rejection letter. REJECTED  I tell you! But do I feel rejected?  No!  I am as happy as a little bird hoisting a juicy watermelon out of the garden.  How do I get this optimistic point of view?   I follow this 12 -Step Rejection Recovery Program:

1. Burn the rejection notice.  Rip it up into tiny little pieces and light a match.  As the bad news goes up in flames chant, “There are no bad quilts, just bad eyesight.” 

 2. Have a day of mourning.  Drape the quilt in black ribbons and remember the good times: cutting the fabric, sewing the little pieces together, and binding the quilt while watching soap operas.  Those were the days.

 3.  Have a good cry.  Use newly purchased fabric from your local quilt shop to dry your tears.

 4. Get a tattoo.  My friend Frieda’s tattoo says, “I love my quilts!”  Make sure to get large type so you can still read it at age 90.

 5.  Document the entry fees as charitable donations on your tax forms.  Consider yourself a patron of the arts and get a refund as well.

 6.  Write a tune of lament like my song “Everybody Gets Rejected Sometime”.  I like a song you can dance to or at least shake you fists.

 7.  Eat chocolate.  The smell of baking brownies always calms me down.  Once I eat a pan-full of gooey chocolate goodies, my memory is completely erased.

 8.  Complain to your friends.  There is nothing like a good rant to cheer you up.  Make audacious claims of incompetence in the quilt judging system, the crazier the better.

 9.  Consider a new occupation.  I, for instance, pursued my dream to be a rocket scientist.  Then I realized I was on the wrong trajectory and returned to earth.

 10.  Buy the quilt show.  If you own the quilt show you can have your quilts on display any time.  Award yourself prizes.

 11.  Hang the rejected quilt in a prominent spot in your home. Kiss it every morning, pat it on the binding, and tell it how pretty it is.

 12.  Make a new quilt.  Make something cheerful and colorful like this Optimistic Bluebird. And just like a little bird in flight, you too will be happy.


Rose Hughes said...

thanks Laura - everyone gets rejected sometime and your words fill us with healing, recovery and most importantly mirth -- nothing better to get us through the day -- laughter!

Barbara said...

best laugh I've had in a long time - thanks, Laura

YankeeQuilter said...

Thanks for the giggle...can I use the same technique when my quilts don't come home with a ribbon?!

Mommarock said...

Oh my gosh.. so funny!! I love #3! Giggles.. I havn't entered any quilts in competition.. but I do love my fabric!

Anonymous said...

Oh Laura, I can not imagine you getting a rejection letter! I am lifting a piece of chocolate in your honor, sorry these posts do not have 'Scratch and sniff' :)
oh yummm the chocolate is good...wish your beautiful little bluebird could bring some for you today.
Love your quilts and writing!
a fan

Quiltmuse said...

But first you have to REACT! Possibilities:

My quilt has been rejected I hear.
That show will not hang it I fear.
But since that's no go
I'll try the next show
And you still might see it this year.


O woe is me! My quilt's rejected
And I am feeling so dejected!
My heart's so very, very sore
That I'm not trying anymore.
One rebuff
Is quite enough.

There is, of course, the other side of the coin:


My quilt's been accepted!
I'm walking on air!
My life is all roses,
I haven't a care!
I might win a ribbon
But if I do not,
The world's had a look
At what I have wrought.

WoolenSails said...

I have not thought of entering a quilt into a challenge. I see that they have a lot of rules and i am not a rule follower;)


ellen gets crafty said...

It's amazing how good chocolate can make us feel. Thanks for the tips.


Beth from Maine said...

I always knew the 12 steps were for me! Now we are sisters.

norma said...

Too, too funny! I especially like the "eat chocolate" part. Of course eating chocolate is also good when celebrating an acceptance, too!.

pcoxdesign said...

What perfect timing and so funny!!! I feel better already!

Lisa said...

This is pretty darn funny! It's hard to believe you've gotten rejected though :-) My favorites are #7 and #10. That would work with just about any venue that likes to reject people. Thanks for the laugh!

Karen said...

HA!!! I love the pat it on the binding and tell it how pretty it is...LOL!

Wen Redmond said...

WoW! I never knew it could be so much fUn to be rejected!

Jenice said...

I love this. I was talking to Annie Smith from Quilting Stash about the steps I needed to take to make quilting my profession. I asked her how she handled the rejection associated with this undertaking and she told me that you had written 12 ways to deal with rejection and I should search it out. Low and behold I open up TQS and there you are. Love it!

Sandra said...

Thanks, I can't wait to get my next rejection letter. Can't believe I've never properly celebrated.
But seriously-I do appreciate the positive outlook.

Maud said...

hysterically funny! I really like Sandra's comment that she can't wait to get a rejection letter! We all need to take ourselves less seriously.

Dianne said...

Your blog never fails to make me smile &/or laugh out loud!! Thanks for being the wonderful you that you are!

Mishka said...

Thanks Laura, this is totally awesome. Will be sharing with my readers next week.